carriealice96:

ahh the inbetweeneers way of life :’)

carriealice96:

ahh the inbetweeneers way of life :’)

(via lovelytrainwreck)

seachelsters:

starwobbles:

friendship love is so confusing
its like ‘hm yes id like to bring u flowers and compliment u and make u the happiest person on earth but no romo’

no romo

(via emmaswaaan)

jalexaremyhomeboys:

rlyhigh:

saevuswinds:

vardaesque:

you don’t understand i would sell my firstborn to know how this story started

Well it all started when Mrs. Hayfer wanted me to babysit her dumb house. When I got the keys, I sat them on top of this pie that I found on the counter. I knew it was going to be given to the family for desert if I didn’t eat it soon, so I was going to plan to eat it in my teacher’s house and dump all the crumbs on her bed. So it’s a win-win, right? Besides, she wouldn’t find out about the crumbs until after I was paid, and this teacher hates me anyway. Then, I got distracted when this hot cheerleader calls me, asking about what movie I’d recommend, but before I could answer, I realize that my mom would be there any second to serve dinner, and there was no way I was sharing that pie. So I bust out of there with the pie and the keys, and the moment I get in the house, I start chowing down on the pie with my bare hands, trying to eat this thing before anyone knows I took it, right? Well, since the pie crust was dry, I chugged a 2-liter bottle of soda whenever my throat would get dry and eventually, I really needed “to go.” Only when I went to flush, the water wouldn’t stop flowing and there was no plunger to be found. Usually I’d just shrug and say it was Josh’s fault or something, but let’s get real here, Mrs. Hayfer would’ve blamed me about her toilet overflowing if I was 30 states away. So I jammed my foot in there, hoping it’d make the toilet stop flushing. Then my phone rings, and I knew it was my mom, asking where her pie went, and because Meghan decided it’d be a great idea to make my ring tone a bunch of cats meowing, Mrs. Hayfer’s dog, Tiberius starts freaking out, bashing into the door over and over again. Now anyone who knows this dog knows that this dog will happily eat anything, and that includes the pie, and probably myself.  So my foot’s totally stuck in there right, I’m freaking out, the dog’s having a seizure and I still got half a pie left. 

i feel it necessary to reblog since i just read that whole thing

NOW I NEED TO KNOW HOW IT ENDS

“She’s the kind of girl a guy meets when he’s too young, and he fucks up because there’s too much living to do. But later he realizes she’s perfect.”
— Californication (via perfect)

(via featherdownisland)

dierwolf:

2014 was one of those years that started out like “THIS IS GOING TO BE GREAT!!!” and its halfway through and we have a war going on, a deadly disease has been spread, countless shootings have happened, racism is alive, more people have been leaving living things inside of hot cars, and robin williams is fucking dead

(via featherdownisland)

i-am-not-your-baby-unicorn:

saltwaterandink:

leviswaxedass:

dahniwitchoflight:

leviswaxedass:

disneydamselestelle:

scottylubemeup:

THIS WAS A CHILDRENS MOVIE
A CHILDRENS BIBLE MOVIE

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) Amen

FUN FACT: in hebrew, “feet” is a euphemism for genitals.
so if you ever see “washing feet” in the bible, it, uh. yeah.
(source is my old bible class textbook which i don’t have on me anymore :( )

HOLY SHIT WHAT
I MEAN CORRECT ME IF IM WRONG BUT I SWEAR TO GOD I REMEMBER READING A STORY IN THE BIBLE WHERE JESUS CLEANED THE ‘FEET’ OF A LADY PROSTITUTE INFRONT OF HIS TWELVE DISCIPLES WHO GOT SERIOUSLY GROSSED OUT. THEM GETTING REALLY SUPER GROSSED OUT BY THAT NEVER MADE SENSE TO ME UNTIL NOW.
JESUS CHRIST JESUS.
YOU NASTY.

#WHAT ARE YOU SUPPOSED TO DO WHEN JESUS IS THE ONE WHO NEEDS JESUS
THAT HASHTAG I”m—-—

Plot Twist: The Bible is full of blowjobs

and they say homosexuality is sin.
i-am-not-your-baby-unicorn:

saltwaterandink:

leviswaxedass:

dahniwitchoflight:

leviswaxedass:

disneydamselestelle:

scottylubemeup:

THIS WAS A CHILDRENS MOVIE
A CHILDRENS BIBLE MOVIE

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) Amen

FUN FACT: in hebrew, “feet” is a euphemism for genitals.
so if you ever see “washing feet” in the bible, it, uh. yeah.
(source is my old bible class textbook which i don’t have on me anymore :( )

HOLY SHIT WHAT
I MEAN CORRECT ME IF IM WRONG BUT I SWEAR TO GOD I REMEMBER READING A STORY IN THE BIBLE WHERE JESUS CLEANED THE ‘FEET’ OF A LADY PROSTITUTE INFRONT OF HIS TWELVE DISCIPLES WHO GOT SERIOUSLY GROSSED OUT. THEM GETTING REALLY SUPER GROSSED OUT BY THAT NEVER MADE SENSE TO ME UNTIL NOW.
JESUS CHRIST JESUS.
YOU NASTY.

#WHAT ARE YOU SUPPOSED TO DO WHEN JESUS IS THE ONE WHO NEEDS JESUS
THAT HASHTAG I”m—-—

Plot Twist: The Bible is full of blowjobs

and they say homosexuality is sin.
i-am-not-your-baby-unicorn:

saltwaterandink:

leviswaxedass:

dahniwitchoflight:

leviswaxedass:

disneydamselestelle:

scottylubemeup:

THIS WAS A CHILDRENS MOVIE
A CHILDRENS BIBLE MOVIE

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) Amen

FUN FACT: in hebrew, “feet” is a euphemism for genitals.
so if you ever see “washing feet” in the bible, it, uh. yeah.
(source is my old bible class textbook which i don’t have on me anymore :( )

HOLY SHIT WHAT
I MEAN CORRECT ME IF IM WRONG BUT I SWEAR TO GOD I REMEMBER READING A STORY IN THE BIBLE WHERE JESUS CLEANED THE ‘FEET’ OF A LADY PROSTITUTE INFRONT OF HIS TWELVE DISCIPLES WHO GOT SERIOUSLY GROSSED OUT. THEM GETTING REALLY SUPER GROSSED OUT BY THAT NEVER MADE SENSE TO ME UNTIL NOW.
JESUS CHRIST JESUS.
YOU NASTY.

#WHAT ARE YOU SUPPOSED TO DO WHEN JESUS IS THE ONE WHO NEEDS JESUS
THAT HASHTAG I”m—-—

Plot Twist: The Bible is full of blowjobs

and they say homosexuality is sin.
i-am-not-your-baby-unicorn:

saltwaterandink:

leviswaxedass:

dahniwitchoflight:

leviswaxedass:

disneydamselestelle:

scottylubemeup:

THIS WAS A CHILDRENS MOVIE
A CHILDRENS BIBLE MOVIE

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) Amen

FUN FACT: in hebrew, “feet” is a euphemism for genitals.
so if you ever see “washing feet” in the bible, it, uh. yeah.
(source is my old bible class textbook which i don’t have on me anymore :( )

HOLY SHIT WHAT
I MEAN CORRECT ME IF IM WRONG BUT I SWEAR TO GOD I REMEMBER READING A STORY IN THE BIBLE WHERE JESUS CLEANED THE ‘FEET’ OF A LADY PROSTITUTE INFRONT OF HIS TWELVE DISCIPLES WHO GOT SERIOUSLY GROSSED OUT. THEM GETTING REALLY SUPER GROSSED OUT BY THAT NEVER MADE SENSE TO ME UNTIL NOW.
JESUS CHRIST JESUS.
YOU NASTY.

#WHAT ARE YOU SUPPOSED TO DO WHEN JESUS IS THE ONE WHO NEEDS JESUS
THAT HASHTAG I”m—-—

Plot Twist: The Bible is full of blowjobs

and they say homosexuality is sin.

i-am-not-your-baby-unicorn:

saltwaterandink:

leviswaxedass:

dahniwitchoflight:

leviswaxedass:

disneydamselestelle:

scottylubemeup:

THIS WAS A CHILDRENS MOVIE

A CHILDRENS BIBLE MOVIE

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) Amen

FUN FACT: in hebrew, “feet” is a euphemism for genitals.

so if you ever see “washing feet” in the bible, it, uh. yeah.

(source is my old bible class textbook which i don’t have on me anymore :( )

HOLY SHIT WHAT

I MEAN CORRECT ME IF IM WRONG BUT I SWEAR TO GOD I REMEMBER READING A STORY IN THE BIBLE WHERE JESUS CLEANED THE ‘FEET’ OF A LADY PROSTITUTE INFRONT OF HIS TWELVE DISCIPLES WHO GOT SERIOUSLY GROSSED OUT. THEM GETTING REALLY SUPER GROSSED OUT BY THAT NEVER MADE SENSE TO ME UNTIL NOW.

JESUS CHRIST JESUS.

YOU NASTY.

#WHAT ARE YOU SUPPOSED TO DO WHEN JESUS IS THE ONE WHO NEEDS JESUS

THAT HASHTAG I”m—-—

Plot Twist: The Bible is full of blowjobs

and they say homosexuality is sin.

(via sworeidnevercomeback)

hiding-in-my-room-alone:

evamalfoy:

theheartlesshorseman:

sm-oriarty:

the-ruby-archer:

4 and 12 are spot on.

Dad, if you see this, please read.

oh my gods all of this is my mother. just my mother. 

2 & 8. My Mum has three kids, her first born who does no wrong, her middle child and her first boy who is her ‘baby’ at 14 and lives on the excuse boys will be boys. Guess who I am.

Wayyyyy to true! My mom does Every. Single. One. Of. These. Ans my dad will ocansionally do some of these too.

(via haileybookky)

thatsonofamitch:

emkaymlp:

please no halloween posts just yet. there’s still 2 months left

did someone say halloween
image

(via hislittleprincessfox)

renton-gg:

broodling:

The most amazing part of this is that the cat is actually using it

omfg
renton-gg:

broodling:

The most amazing part of this is that the cat is actually using it

omfg
renton-gg:

broodling:

The most amazing part of this is that the cat is actually using it

omfg
renton-gg:

broodling:

The most amazing part of this is that the cat is actually using it

omfg
renton-gg:

broodling:

The most amazing part of this is that the cat is actually using it

omfg
renton-gg:

broodling:

The most amazing part of this is that the cat is actually using it

omfg
renton-gg:

broodling:

The most amazing part of this is that the cat is actually using it

omfg
renton-gg:

broodling:

The most amazing part of this is that the cat is actually using it

omfg
renton-gg:

broodling:

The most amazing part of this is that the cat is actually using it

omfg
renton-gg:

broodling:

The most amazing part of this is that the cat is actually using it

omfg

renton-gg:

broodling:

The most amazing part of this is that the cat is actually using it

omfg

(via hislittleprincessfox)

japhers:

folwer:

but its important

IM SORRY BUT IM DYING THEY LOOK LIKE A BOY BAND

japhers:

folwer:

but its important

IM SORRY BUT IM DYING THEY LOOK LIKE A BOY BAND

(via betakenseriously)